UNFORGIVENESS
AN
UNFORGIVEABLE
SIN?

By
Buddy Axley

FOREWORD

Believers and unbelievers alike have many questions about sin and forgiveness.  “Which is the greatest sin?”  “Which is the worst sin?”  “Which sin or sins are so bad that God would never forgive me?”  Questions like this are common to many people.

God, our Heavenly Father, through the Lord Jesus Christ has forgiven all sins of all men, forever, if they will only repent, confess their sins and then receive and believe in His forgiveness.  He is willing to forgive if we are willing to turn away from our sins, by His grace, and receive reconciliation with Him through faith. John the Baptist announced Jesus, the Messiah, in this way.  “Behold the Lamb of God Who takes away the sin of the world.”  John 1:29.

The question then is not what sin is too great or too bad; but the question is, will we submit to the Gospel, the Word of God and His will, so that we can receive His mercy and pardon?

If we recognize our need for forgiveness, cleansing, and restoration from God, through the Blood of Jesus, how can we refuse to submit to His will when He commands us to forgive others? Do they not deserve what God so graciously gives to us? When Jesus’ disciples ask Him to teach them how to pray, He included a principle of prayer that we should have when we pray.  That principle is forgiveness.  “…Forgive us our sins for we ourselves also forgive everyone who is indebted to us – who has offended us or done us wrong; …” Luke 11:4 (Amp Vers).  In Matthew, Chapter 6, verse 12, Jesus says: “And forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven (left, remitted and let go the debts, and given up resentment against) our debtors. (Amp Vers).  Notice what Jesus says; “Forgive us, for we also forgive everyone.” “Forgive us as we also have forgiven.”  This should be a continuous “we forgive everyone” and a conscious “we have forgiven” attitude and act.

Is unforgiveness an unforgivable sin?  As we continue to seek the Lord together, I believe He will give us the answer. If we want the forgiveness of God, we must give that forgiveness to other people.  The Lord, Himself, has made our forgiveness of others the condition of His forgiveness of us. If we do not forgive others then He will not forgive us. But if we forgive others, then He will freely give us His forgiveness.  Herein lies the key for a happy and fulfilled Christian life of freedom and victory.  

INTRODUCTION

            The act of forgiveness is an act of divine love.  God forgave us through His everlasting, divine love and it is through this same divine love that He has put in us, that we can forgive others.  “…the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” Romans 5:5.  “But the fruit of the (Holy) Spirit (the work which His presence within accomplishes) is love…” Galatians 5:2(Amp).

When we believe that God so loved us that He sent Jesus to save us, redeem us and forgive us from our sins through the shedding of His precious blood, then we begin to realize the great importance of forgiveness.  Because of the great price that was paid by Jesus for our forgiveness, and because of this great love of the Father for all mankind, I believe that it would be impossible for us to live in union with Christ while being hypocrites by refusing to forgive others.  Therefore, Jesus said: “For if you forgive men for their transgressions, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.” Matthew 6:14-15.

We will clearly see as we seek God together that for God’s forgiveness of us to be unconditional and beneficial, our forgiveness of others has to be unconditional.  We will also see that forgiveness of others is not optional but it is a commandment from the Lord Jesus Christ to all.  He wants us to give forgiveness and receive forgiveness so that we may be free to live and to move and to have our being in Him.  See Acts 17:2.

Again, let me emphasize, that forgiveness is a supernatural, divine act and can only be accomplished through His grace, love, and power.  Many people who have freely and gladly received this supernatural love of God, the Father, through Jesus Christ, the Son, are attempting to forgive others through their natural strength.  We can quickly become frustrated and discouraged when we are making efforts on our own to forgive someone. Therefore, in these instances when we are not depending on God’s virtue of love and faith, we are not able to forgive.  The same principle applies when we ask others to forgive us and do not feel that they have done so.  Remember, we live by faith not by our feelings and emotions, so forgiveness has to be given and received by faith.  I know, even in the case of believers who confess their sins to the Lord, that if there is no faith in the Lord’s desire and will to forgive them, then it is impossible for them to receive the benefits of His forgiveness.  “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”  I John 1:9. And He wants us to be faithful in forgiving others.  Unforgiveness towards others is a sin!  If we are harboring or retaining unforgiveness for anyone then we are living in sin!  We must repent from this sin and confess it so that we can receive our forgiveness from Jesus!  He is faithful to forgive us! Amen!

Let’s realize that we must forgive others, and begin to do so in the Name of Jesus!  “And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.”  Colossians 3:17.  We need to say to others who need our forgiveness: “I forgive you, in the Name of Jesus!”  When we ask others for forgiveness, we need to say:  “Forgive me, in the Name of Jesus!”  When others say to us, “I forgive you”, we need to say, “I receive your forgiveness in the Name of Jesus!’  Thank you, Father!

CONSEQUENCES OF UNFORGIVENESS

            In Matthew, Chapter 18, Peter asked Jesus a question that prompted the Lord to teach us another important lesson on forgiveness.  Peter asked that if we forgive our brother, who sins against us, seven times, is that going to be sufficient to satisfy the Lord.  Jesus answered Peter in a way that indicates that we should forgive others as many times as is necessary.  Jesus said, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” (vs. 22).  I believe this means that there is no limit on the times that we forgive.  I have heard others teach that the original language says that what Jesus meant was 490 times in one day for the same sin, indicating an infinite and perpetual act of forgiveness.  Glory to God!

Jesus continued to apply this forgiveness principle using a parable that He said compared to the Kingdom of Heaven.  Please take a moment to read Matthew 18:23-35. After reading this account we can see the analogy of the parable.  Here we have a servant who owed his master an equivalent of $10,000,000.  He asked His master to forgive him this enormous debt.  His master showed great mercy to his servant and forgave him his debt.  Immediately this same servant went out and found a fellow servant that owed him an equivalent of $20 and demanded repayment.  But because this fellow servant could not repay this $20, the servant who was forgiven $10,000,000 threw his fellow servant into debtor’s prison.  Upon hearing of this unforgiving attitude in the forgiven servant, the master then ordered him to be turned over to the torturers until repayment was made.  Jesus then says: “So shall My Heavenly Father also do to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart." (vs. 35).

Of course it should be clear to us that the price that Jesus paid for our forgiveness is worth more than ten million dollars.  In fact, it is priceless.  But because we have such finite minds, He uses the comparison of a ten million-dollar forgiven debt to a twenty-dollar unforgiven debt.  Take close notice of the consequences that come to the life of the unforgiving servant.  He was turned over to the torturers and put into prison. When we refuse to forgive others, satan has entrance into our lives and we are tormented and enter into all types of bondage.  We cannot experience the freedom and peace that Jesus has provided for us unless we are quick to forgive others.

In John, Chapter 20, Jesus spoke to His disciples about forgiving or retaining the sins of anyone.  This occurred immediately after He spoke peace to them and breathed the Holy Spirit into them so that they could be regenerated with His new life.  The forgiveness of others was the first issue that Jesus charged His disciples with after they entered into His Kingdom.  “Jesus therefore said to them again, ‘Peace be with you, as the Father has sent Me, I also send you.’ And when He had said this, He breathed on them and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit!  If you forgive the sins of any, their sins have been forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they have been retained’”(vs. 21-23).  By the power of the Holy Spirit, we are able to forgive others and loose them from the bondage that unforgiveness brings on them and us alike. 

Jesus also said something similar to Peter in Matthew, Chapter 16, after Peter had a revelation of who Jesus really was.  “I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in Heaven.”(vs.19).  Although there is deeper meaning to these scriptures, let us stay focused on the subject of unforgiveness.  This passage says as surely as we should loose others from their sins, through forgiveness, it also says that we can retain the sins of others and bind their lives and ours by unforgiveness.  We must realize that what we do on the earth has a definite and corresponding effect in the heavenly realm.  God has put authority in our lives through the indwelling Christ to bind and loose and to retain and forgive.  This should bring about a new level of the fear of the Lord in our lives.  We must recognize our responsibility to forgive others so that they may be freed and that we may also experience liberty.  Let’s not abuse our Kingdom privileges through binding others and ourselves with unforgiveness.  Let’s bind the devil away from having entrance into our lives and in the lives of others; and let’s loose others and ourselves into the joy and peace of the Lord through the spirit of love and forgiveness.  Hallelujah!

We have been called to a life of the faith of Jesus.  He has given us authority in His Name and wants us to speak to the mountains of life and cast them into the sea.  He wants us to receive when we pray and believe and not doubt in our hearts so that we shall be granted what we say.  We find this confirmed in Mark, Chapter 11, in verses 22-25.  However, we must acknowledge another principal that is included in the prayer of faith, and that is forgiveness.  Jesus said: “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone; so that your Father also Who is in heaven may forgive you your transgressions.” (vs. 25).  Unforgiveness blocks the prayer of faith and nullifies our power and authority in the Lord.  Jesus has linked faith and forgiveness together and we should do the same.  Remember that “Faith works by love” and that forgiveness is also an act of love by faith.  Amen!

Paul was constantly dealing with the carnal attitudes and actions of the church of Corinth.  In chapter eleven, his exhortation deals with improperly remembering the Lord’s death by the eating of the bread and the drinking of the cup in an unworthy manner.  The Holy Spirit is saying to us through these passages that we must correctly discern and appreciate the body of Christ and be willing to judge ourselves rightly.  Again, we must not be hypocrites and mock the wonderful forgiveness that was given to us by our Lord through His death upon the cross.  If we enter into the celebration of the Lord’s supper in the fellowship of the saints with unforgiveness towards others then we bring judgment and condemnation upon ourselves.  “For this reason, many among you are weak and sick, and a number sleep.” (vs.30).  This verse in the Amplified Version says: “That (careless and unworthy participation) is the reason why many of you are weak and sickly, and quite enough of you are fallen into the sleep of death.”  In I John, Chapter 5, we find another exhortation concerning sin that leads to physical death.  “If any sees his brother (believer) committing a sin that does not  (lead to) death  (the extinguishing of life), he will pray and (God) will give life – yes, He will grant life to all those whose sin is not (one leading) to death.  There is a sin (that leads) to death: I do not say that one should pray for that.  All wrong doing is sin, and there is sin which does not (involve) death – that may be repented of and forgiven.”  (vs. 16-17 Amp).

Let me say to you from the depth of my heart, that if we try to live with unforgiveness in our hearts we are susceptible to weakness, sickness and death.  We have prayed for many people, a good portion of who were Christians who were experiencing weakness, sickness, depression, oppression, and even for those who were in the grip of death.  I must sadly say with all the compassion that I can appropriate at the moment, that many of these afflicted people have had a root of bitterness, resentment, offense, and unforgiveness as the basic cause of their problem.

My dearly beloved friends and brethren let us cease suffering for unrighteousness sake.  Let us cease destroying ourselves with the consequences of unforgiveness; but instead, let us live and walk in the light as He, Himself, is in the light and have true and unbroken fellowship with the Lord and one another.  We need to ask God, the Father, for the blood of Jesus Christ to cleanse us from the sin of unforgiveness.  Please! Right this moment, make the decision in your heart to repent and ask the Lord to forgive you and restore you to a right spirit.  The spirit of forgiveness!  Amen! 

GOD’S LOVE, THE SOLUTION FOR UNFORGIVENESS

As we look at what God’s love in us actually is and what it definitely is not, we will see that the solution to unforgiveness lies in God’s love manifesting itself in and through us.  Divine love is graphically expressed and defined in 1 Corinthians, Chapter 13, (Amplified Version).  According to the Word of God that we find here, we gain nothing nor are we considered useful to the Lord if we do not have His love operating in our lives. (See vss.1-3).  “Love endures long and is patient and kind…” (vs.4).  Does this not have to do with the way we relate to people?  “…it is not rude…” (vs.5).  If we are unforgiving toward someone then we will be rude to them.  “…it is not touchy or fretful or resentful…” (vs.5). All of these are manifestations of unforgiveness.  “…it takes no account of the evil done to it – pays no attention to a suffered wrong…” (vs.5).  This is only possible through forgiveness of those who do evil to us and treat us wrongly.  “…Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person… and it endures everything (without weakening)…” (vs.7).  When we do not quickly forgive others then we cannot easily deal with the issues of life.  Life becomes burdensome and we become weak and weary, sick and tired, and frustrated and discouraged.  If we are not willing to forgive someone then we will not see the best in them either; rather we will see the worst.  If we are experiencing these things in our lives then it is a good sign that we are harboring unforgiveness toward others.  If unforgiveness remains in our lives it will eventually progress into pure hatred. “If someone says, ‘I love God, and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen.” I John 4:20.  Love never fails.  Hallelujah!  If we are willing to walk in love then we will not fail to forgive!

Forgiveness is a commandment of the Lord, not an option.  “The one who says, ‘I have come to know Him, and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him; but whoever keeps His word, in him the love of God has truly been perfected.  By this we know that we are in Him: the one who says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same manner as He walked.” I John 2:6.

How are we walking and talking?  Did Jesus not walk and talk forgiveness?  He was crucified an innocent man.  He was falsely accused and abused, lied about, plotted against, tortured and ridiculed.  Through all of this, He gave us the supreme example of forgiveness while he was hanging on the cross.  He said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34.  Stephen said, as he was being stoned to death, “…Lord, do not hold this sin against them…” Acts 7:60.  Are we ready to say that to the Lord about those who have done us wrong?  Are we ready to look down at those from our little crosses and forgive them from our hearts that are filled with God’s love?  Can we really say with Paul: “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me, and delivered Himself up for me.”? Galatians 2:20.  God forgave us for all things, forever, through His Son, Jesus Christ.  Let’s live the life of faith in Him.  Let’s walk in love and freely give forgiveness to others.  Freely and generously we have received; let us freely and generously give.

In Galatians, Chapter 5, we find another strong exhortation of love and a warning against strife and hatred.  Remember that prolonged unforgiveness leads to hatred.  “For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” (vs.13).  Are we free to walk in unforgiveness?  Yes, we can use our free will not to forgive, but that places us into bondage or the yoke of slavery, once again.  The freedom that Christ set us free for was to serve one another in His love.  “For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”  But if you bite and devour one another, take care lest you be consumed by one another.” (vs.14-15).  When we fail to forgive, especially in the body of Christ, this absence of love causes the destruction of the church.  From my observations, more local churches have been rendered null and void through unforgiveness than for any other reason.  As we go on further in this chapter, we see that many of the deeds of the flesh are rooted in unforgiveness.  “Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are …. enmities, strife,…outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions,…those who practice such things shall not inherit the Kingdom of God.”(vss.19-21).  Remember that our inheritance in Jesus is His Kingdom.  He has given it to us, but we must receive it and live in it.  “…For the Kingdom of God is…righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.”  Romans 14:17.

 In this message to the church in Galatians, Chapter 5, we read that, “..the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control…Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.  If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.” (vss. 22-24).  When we live and walk by the Spirit, we are living and walking in the spirit of forgiveness and we are enjoying our inheritance in the Kingdom of God.

 Remember also that Jesus said we should ask the Father that His Kingdom come and that His will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.  I believe Kingdom living is for the here and now.  Do you?  Do you believe that there is unforgiveness in Heaven?  Do you believe that it is God’s will for us to live and walk in the spirit of forgiveness?  If we believe and are convicted by this then let us be quick to forgive!  Amen!

In the letter to the church in Ephesians in Chapter 4, we find additional exhortations by Paul about the manner in which we should live and walk as true believers.  “This I say therefore, and affirm together with the Lord, that you walk no longer just as the Gentiles walk…” (vs.17). Paul goes on to list certain characteristics of unregenerate people (Gentiles) such as: futile minds, ignorance, hardness of heart, sensuality, impurity, and greediness which are again deeds of the flesh.  Paul then says something very important: “But you did not learn Christ in this way, if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught in Him, just as truth is in Jesus..." (vss.20-21).  Jesus says if we have ears to hear we should hear what the Spirit is saying to the church.  Are we listening with our “heart ears” to His Word?  Paul continues his exhortation: “And that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.”  (vss.23-24).

What is God’s likeness?  Is He a forgiving God?  What is Christlikeness?  We have been created in His likeness in Christ Jesus.  We see that we have been made in Him, “…wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification, and redemption.” I Corinthians 1:30.  If we are walking in wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and redemption then we will surely be walking in forgiveness.  Again in Ephesians, Chapter 4, Paul goes on to correct and reprove us by saying that in this redeemed state we should: stop lying to one another, stop being angry thus giving the devil an opportunity, steal no longer, stop speaking unwholesome words to each other, but rather edify each other in our speech, stop grieving the Holy Spirit, let go of all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor and slander, and put away malice. (vs.31).  Then he sums up this instruction by saying, “..and be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” (vs.32).  He continues with this strong statement, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love..” Ephesians 5:1-2.  As we pray and cry out to God for Him to mold us and make us and to change us more into His image, then my friends, let us recognize and understand that His image is love and forgiveness!. 

We receive yet another exhortation to the church in Colossians, Chapter 3, that is very similar to the exhortation we just received from Ephesians.  This should show us something about our natural, fleshly nature in contrast to our supernatural, spiritual nature in Christ.  It should show us that no matter where we live or what culture we are a part of we have similar problems.  The major problem is that our flesh wars against our spirit.  Our human nature does not want to forgive and walk in God’s love, but our divine nature is loving and forgiving.  Thank God, our divine nature is greater that our human nature, in Jesus Name.  Amen!

So Paul tells us in Colossians, Chapter 3, that we should consider our earthly body dead to sin.  Although we once walked and lived in sin, he says put these sins all aside:  “…anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from our mouth.  Do not lie to one another, once you laid aside the old self with its evil practice, and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One Who created him.” (vss.8-10).  As we are being renewed to a true knowledge and changed to the image of Jesus day by day we will constantly be laying aside the old self and putting on the new self.  The old self is evil, unholy, unloving, and unforgiving. But because of Jesus, the new self is the opposite.  The new self is forgiving, loving, holy, and good.  Amen!

Paul makes a very important point here: “…. a renewal in which there is no distinction between Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave and free man, but Christ is all, and in all.” (vs.11).  I am sharing these truths with you from the Czech Republic, which along with other eastern block countries suffered under communism for over 40 years. This nation, which was formerly Czechoslovakia, has been occupied off and on for many centuries.  Those who occupied this country oppressed them, wronged them and used and abused them.  It would be easy for the Czech people to guard bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness towards those who have occupied their land.  But for those here who believe that Jesus has set them free from all oppressors past, present and future, they can easily forgive.    “You know of Jesus of Nazareth, how God anointed Him with the Holy Spirit and with power, and how He went about doing good, and healing all who were oppressed by the devil; for God was with Him.” Acts 10:38.  Jesus is the same today as He was then and if we will obey the Gospel regardless of our race, nationality or origin, and walk in this renewed life of Christ, then we will be able to forgive anyone who has done us any wrong.  Jesus is All in All!  Glory to God!

With this in mind, let’s look at the following instruction that Paul gave us in Colossians, Chapter 3.  “And so, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.  And beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.” (vss.12-14).

Let us be encouraged to see the critical importance of forgiveness not only as individual believers, but also as a corporate body.  This unity of the Spirit cannot exist in our midst if we are tolerating and persisting in the spirit of unforgiveness because unforgiveness not only destroys us but it destroys the bond of unity and quenches the Holy Spirit among the saints of God.

As instruments and vessels of God’s love we should be interested in covering and helping to restore the consequences of sin in others.   This does not mean that we should cover up, ignore and avoid dealing with sin in each other’s lives but we should confront one another in the Spirit of love, forgiveness and reconciliation.  This is particularly true when someone has wronged and sinned against us.  “He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends.” Proverbs 17:9 (Amp.).  “Above all have intense and unfailing love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins (forgives and disregards the offenses of others).” I Peter 4:8(Amp Ver).  

CONFRONTATIONS IN THE SPIRIT OF FORGIVENESS

Right now, we are being confronted with the matter of unforgiveness.  If we are going to grow up in Christ, then confrontations are a necessary part of our lives.  Most of us avoid confrontation because we do not want to deal with the problems that can result from the confrontation.  Some of us do not want to deal with others because we have religious ideas that it is not the loving thing to do, or we fear rejection, persecution, and the like.  Some of us do not want to be dealt with either because we think others are prejudiced against us and want vengeance towards us, or because we think they want to harm us or hurt us.  However, if we really care for one another, we will confront one another, but we will do so in the right manner and in the right spirit.  That spirit is the spirit of forgiveness and restoration.  “Open rebuke is better than love that is hidden” Proverbs 27:5 (Amp Vers).  “Jesus loves me this I know!”  If we really believe He loves us then we will receive His reproof, rebuke, correction, and discipline.  “Those who I (dearly and tenderly) love, I tell their faults and convict and convince and reprove and chasten – (that is) I discipline and instruct them.” Revelation 3:19 (Amp Vers). He does this so that we may repent.

He also desires to use us as His instruments to confront, correct and reprove one another so that we may repent and escape the bondage and traps that satan has for us.  “And the Lord’s bondservant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.”  II Timothy 2:24-26.  This is Paul’s exhortation and instruction to his co-worker in the Gospel, Timothy.  He repeats once again that the importance of dealing with others is for their benefit and welfare.  “I solemnly charge you in the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, …. preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction.  For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine… and will turn away their ears from the truth…”  II Timothy 4:1-4.  Jesus says: “Be on your guard!  If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him.” Luke 17:4.

Sin must be recognized, confronted and repented of so that we can be reconciled to God and one another.  Sin must be dealt with in our lives.  Whether we are the one who has been sinned against or whether we are the one who has sinned against another, forgiveness of these sins and reconciliation with God and with each other is the Lord’s final goal and purpose.

We mishandle dealing with sin in each other’s lives because we fail to have God’s purposes in our hearts.  He has our best interest at heart.  We should have the same interest for one another. “If therefore there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose.  Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for our own personal interest, but also for the interests of others.”  Philippians 2:1-4.

If we are truly interested in each other, we will love one another enough to confront and help one another to be free of sin and bondage.  How should this be done?  By faith working through love, with a forgiving and merciful attitude and with a desire to see one another gain the victory that Jesus gave His life for us to enjoy.

Let’s look at Jesus’ advice and counsel on how we should conduct ourselves in confrontations.  “And if your brother sins go and reprove him in private: if he listens to you, you have won your brother.”  Matthew 18:15.  Take note that Jesus instructs us to go to one another and confront and reprove one another in private.  He is not in favor of us making each other’s sins a matter of public knowledge, shame, and disgrace if we can deal with one another in private.  Many times our sins are known publicly because they are committed in the witness of others, but the Spirit of God does not want to destroy, condemn and shame His people; but rather He wants to lift us up and to rescue and restore us.  So, first we should go to one another in private in hopes that there will be repentance that we can give and receive forgiveness to be reconciled. Remember, we have been given the ministry of reconciliation, in Jesus’ Name.  Please read II Corinthians 5:17-21. 

If we cannot convince the other person or if we cannot be convinced to repent of sin, then the Lord says go back and confront again with one or two witnesses.  “But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed.”  Matthew 18:16.  We have observed that this second phase of confrontation, if necessary, is not often followed through on.  The Lord, in all of His wisdom knows well that this manner of dealing with each other by the use of witnesses can eliminate several problems.  It can eliminate an unfair accusation or a legalistic and merciless attitude of the one dealing with another in private.  It can also eliminate the sinner from justifying his sin and falsely accusing the person who has come to confront him.  Remember, brethren, the end result that God desires is to see us repent, to be forgiven or to forgive, and to be restored or to help to restore.  If we do not deal with one another on a spiritual and scriptural basis then further conflicts, strife, misunderstandings, and even more unforgiveness can result rather than deliverance and healing.

In most cases that we have observed and experienced in the body of Christ, when these first two means of confrontation are appropriated, there is repentant fruit, to God’s glory, and freedom and restoration comes for His people.  On some occasions it is necessary, however, to proceed to the next step if the person in sin refuses to listen and repent.  “And if he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax gatherer.” Matthew 18:17.  What is of the utmost importance to the Lord is to see all of us free from sin.  We must have the same attitude!  When we don’t, then everyone suffers and the welfare of the church and its witness to the world is greatly affected.  As I said previously, it is rare that someone who is in sin has to be brought before the whole church.  I believe that abuse in confrontation or the neglect of confrontation will leave the door open for satan to cause further confusion, dissension, offense and worst of all, more unforgiveness.  Notice that whatever we “bind or loose on earth … and where two or more agree about anything… it shall be done in Heaven for us by our Father.” (See vss.18-19).  And where two or three are gathered in His Name, Jesus is there in the midst with His presence to keep all things in His divine order and will.  (See vs 20).

Let’s look at an incident in the Church at Corinth in which the above principles were not applied and let’s notice the consequences of a lack of faith and love on the part of the church there.  In 1 Corinthians, Chapter 5, Paul reproved the church for a passive attitude in not dealing with sin in their midst. “It is reported that there is immorality among you,…and you have become arrogant, and have not mourned instead, in order that the one who has done this deed might be removed from your midst.” (vss.1-2).  Paul continues admonishing the church to deal with this brother so that he would repent and his spirit be saved in the day of the Lord.  He says that the condition of their church is contaminated because of sin in the camp and leaven in the lump.  He exhorts them not to continue to associate with any so-called brother, not even to eat with such a one.  “Is it not those inside (the church) upon whom you are to pass disciplinary judgment – passing censuring sentence on them (as the facts require)?” (vs.12).  We have witnessed churches that have religiously abused this scripture to get rid of undesirable people who they didn’t like or who affected their reputation instead of caring that these people perish.  We must deal with one another in the right spirit and with the right motive because the Lord is “…not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.” 11 Peter 3:9.

The problem is that many times the church does not want to forgive someone who sins in their midst.  This unforgiveness against the sinner can cause just as much destruction to the church as leaving a sinner in the midst of the body that is undealt with.  In II Corinthians, Chapter 2, once again Paul has to admonish the church at Corinth, in regard to this brother who was disciplined and removed before from that body of believers.  “Sufficient for such a one is this punishment which was inflicted by the majority, so that on the contrary you should rather forgive and comfort him lest somehow such a one be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.  Wherefore I urge you to reaffirm your love for him…  But whom you forgive anything, I forgive also; for indeed what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ, in order that no advantage be taken of us by satan; for we are not ignorant of his schemes.” (vss .6-11). 

Let’s take another look at satan’s schemes and tactics.  One tactic is to influence us not to confront one another about sin that exists in our lives.  Another scheme is to have us confront one another with a condemning, unforgiving and unmerciful spirit.  Also, the devil tries to influence us to continue to reject one another even if there has been fruit of repentance. This is the method that he was using in the above case by trying to influence the church not to make every effort to restore, with a spirit of forgiveness, the brother to the fellowship of the saints and the love of the brethren.  Remember, what the Lord Jesus said: “the thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and may have it abundantly.”  John 10:10.  Praise His Holy Name!

There is another problem that results if we confront one another in the wrong way.  Again, the wrong way is with a spirit of resentment, revenge, hatred, or unforgiveness.  This normally occurs us when we have been the victims of wrongdoing.  The following exhortation needs to be received with a humble and open heart. Romans, Chapter 12 says: “Never pay back evil for evil to anyone.  Respect what is right in the sight of all men.  If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.  Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord. ‘But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head.’ Do not become overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (vss.17-21).

We must learn that God’s ways are higher and better than our ways!  We must realize that we are all responsible to the Lord for our own sins. As true believers, we are also accountable to one another.  If we sin against our brother we must repent and ask forgiveness from the Lord and from him.  If we have been sinned against, we must forgive and release that person from that sin.  Certainly no sin is pleasing to the Lord so He requires all of us to repent and to ask for forgiveness.  However, He also requires us to forgive others, no matter what they have done to us.  If we don’t, He will not forgive us.  This sin of unforgiveness must be confronted in our own lives and in the lives of others.  If we refuse to forgive others or refuse to ask forgiveness from others then we interfere, interrupt, impede, and even prevent the restoration process of God in our lives. If we obey God by forgiving others and asking forgiveness from others, then His restoration and blessing will flow into our lives.   

FINALLY BRETHREN

            One of the main reasons that we struggle to forgive others is because of our lack of understanding of the mercy of God towards all who sin.  Jesus said, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. Matthew 5:7.  We shall reap whatever we sow. That is God’s principle.  We, as the body of Christ in particular should show mercy to one another, by helping one another and bearing one another’s burdens.  “Brethren, even if a man is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to himself, lest you too be tempted.  Bear one another’s burdens, and thus fulfill the law of Christ.  For if anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.” Galatians 6:1-3.  If we sow unforgiveness, we will reap unforgiveness, first from God and then from others.  “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap.  For the one who sows to his own flesh shall from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit shall from the Spirit reap eternal life.  And let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we shall reap if we do not grow weary.  So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all men, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.”  Galatians 6:7-10.

           Many of us in our arrogant self-confidence have belittled and criticized others for their sins, while having a heart of guile and deceit ourselves.  How grievous it is for our Lord to see this unforgiving, merciless, hypocrisy in us.  Remember, “God resists and opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble.”  (See James 4:6 and I Peter 5:6.)  “Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall.”  Proverbs 16:18 (Amp Vers).  Let's be sensitive in our attitudes toward others that fall into sin, even if it directly and adversely affects us.  Let’s forgive and help restore each other in the spirit of humility, grace, and mercy.  Let’s not think too highly of ourselves, because we too could fall into sin.  That is exactly what happens, in fact, to unforgiving, judgmental and condemning Christians.  We need to remember that Jesus left us to continue His ministry of reconciliation.  John tells us that Jesus came into the world not to condemn the world, but to save the world.  (See John 3:17.)

The last four verses of Hebrews, Chapter 4, say that we have a Great High Priest, Who has passed through the heavens, and He is Jesus, the Son of God.  There is no creature hidden from His sight.  All things are laid bare to the eyes of Him, to Whom we have to give an account.  It should be of great encouragement to us to know that although Jesus sees all and knows all about each one of us, He is touched with compassion and understands our weaknesses.  These passages of scripture say that He was tempted in all things just as we are, yet He did not yield to these temptations nor did He sin.  He was tempted not to forgive those who wronged Him, but He did not yield to this temptation.  Where is our strength found in the midst of weakness and in the temptation not to forgive?  It is found in Him!  Hallelujah!  Let’s depend on Jesus for this strength and ability to forgive. “Let us therefore draw near with confidence to the throne of grace that we may receive mercy and may find grace to help in a time of need.” Hebrews 4:16.  Let’s encourage one another to learn to forgive.  Let’s help each other to learn to ask for forgiveness so we can be restored to the fellowship of our Father and to the fellowship of the saints.

 “Father, help us to realize our need to have Your forgiveness, Your mercy, and Your grace towards others.  Give us more understanding of the great compassion through which Jesus was able to forgive those who rejected Him, the religious hypocrites who falsely accused Him, persecuted Him, and planned and plotted His destruction and death, Judas, who betrayed Him, Pontius Pilate, who condemned Him to crucifixion, Peter, who denied Him, the other disciples who deserted and doubted Him, and the Roman soldiers who mocked, beat, tortured and killed Him.  Give us His heart and spirit of forgiveness towards all those who have sinned against us.  We have been weak in our willingness to forgive others, so we ask You for help and strength in this time of need.  Help us to receive Your grace and mercy to be able to forgive any and all persons, who You bring to our remembrance through the power and knowledge of the Holy Spirit.  We thank You for this help, as we realize our need for Your forgiveness in our lives.  We repent of unforgiveness and confess it as sin in our lives.  We receive Your forgiveness and cleansing from this unrighteousness, right now!  And we make the decision to quickly forgive others from this day forward, In Jesus Mighty Name!

Love to all, in Him,
Buddy Axley
Czech Republic, Europe
May 1, 2002